1. |
Make Yourself at Home
03:43
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It's a quarter past embarrassing and the sun sets on my face
They filter in in dribs and drabs, I need to get out of this place
I'm the washing machine on your front lawn
I feel like I shouldn't be here
I'm the charger you left in the wall in the hotel in Langenberg last year
But you say sit down there and make yourself at home
Is the only place I really feel at home
I'm the Gooner at the Shed End on derby day, I'm the Micra in the middle lane
I'm the U2 record that appeared on your phone I feel so out of place
I'm the CCTV in the changing room, the Euro in your purse
I'm the vegan at the barbecue in Bonn, I always fear the worst
But you say sit down there and make yourself at home
Is the only place I really feel at home
The ex at the wedding, the drunk girl you're bedding, the apostrophe on the greengrocer's sign
The shampoo bottle you emptied six weeks ago still sitting on the side of your bath in your home
Make yourself at home, is the only place I really feel at home
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2. |
Down With The Yoof
04:21
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We started in St. Margaret's Hospice then YMCA
now it's British Heart Foundation it's the seventh one today
and I'm wading through the PC games and books and DVDs
so far I've found more than twenty seven Bourne Identitys
and I sit down by the changing room and have a little rest
and I see you with a Wrangler top held up against your chest
I realise you're serious and my heart begins to sink
as you smile and suck in your gut and ask "What do you think?"
You should put that shirt back on the rail, pretend it wasn't there
We all kept quiet when you mentioned growing out your hair
But someone's gotta tell you and I feel kinda bad
But I don't wanna be the kid with the double denim dad
I don't mind you hugging me in front of all my mates
And I let it go when you say 'bae', 'amazeballs', 'totes' and 'blates'
And I understand that sometimes you are gonna wanna dance
Even if it is the can-can you did-did last year in France
I can even cope with Speedos when you take me to the pool
Or flirting with my RE teacher at meetings after school
Or hoonin' down the High Street, music blaring out the roof
Although Besta Venya's not exactly 'Down with the Yoof'
Put that shirt back on the rail, pretend it wasn't there
We all kept quiet when you mentioned growing out your hair
But someone's gotta tell you and I feel kinda bad
But I don't wanna be the kid with the double denim dad
I know it's your decision and you have every right
But Whitney dressing up as Britney's not a pretty sight
I know you're getting older and I know it must be hard
but know that I am proud of you just the way you are
So put that shirt back on the rail, pretend it wasn't there
We all kept quiet when you mentioned growing out your hair
Someone's got to tell you and I feel kinda bad
But I don't wanna be the kid with the double denim dad
No I don't wanna be the kid with the double denim dad
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3. |
Guess I'll Never Know
04:45
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I left it too late on the first train to Arklow this morning
So I sat in the doorwell with a girl who was painting her nails
And each tiny masterpiece, a pastiche of what came before it,
was trying its hardest to stop me from turning away
and just for a moment she noticed me looking
she gave me a smile and it got me thinking
What if my heart took my head by the hand
and showed it where to go?
Well I guess I'll never know
I left it too late on the first train to Arklow this morning
so I sat in the doorwell with a guy who was lost in his book
the sound of each page as it turned was a gentle reminder
we were nearing the station so I mustered the courage to look
and just for a moment he noticed me looking
he gave me a smile and it got me thinking
What if my heart took my head by the hand
and showed it where to go?
Well I guess I'll never know
I wish I had talked to you and asked how you're doing
and found out who you were and where you were going
and talked about travelling and movies and music
I wish I had done that but I knew that I'd lose it
What if my heart took my head by the hand
and showed it where to go?
Well I guess I'll never know, I guess I'll never know
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4. |
Es Tut Mir Leid
04:11
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Es Tut Mir Leid
Walking down the high street in the middle of Cologne
I've got one eye on the pavement and the other's on my phone
Checking data roaming's off and searching for WLAN
I'm not looking where I'm going I nearly hit another man
I said "Entschuldigung", he said "Kein problem"
He said "Nichts passiert", he said "Alles ist okay"
I went to find a cafe for a coffee and a cake
And the waitress looked a little like the guy from Less than Jake
If he had shorter dreadlocks and a West Indian dad
I had to pay with fifty euro it was all I had
I said "Entschuldigung", she said "Kein problem"
She said "Nichts passiert", she said "Alles ist okay"
"You really shouldn't go round saying sorry all the time
The apology it never really seems to fit the crime
You English you're all the same, you're far too polite"
And I said "Yes, yes, es tut mir leid"
Gonna find a Späti in the middle of the night
I heard the engine roar and I was blinded by the light
I woke up in a hospital and looked up at a guy
Who said he didn't notice me as he was driving by
He said "Entschuldigung", I said "Kein problem"
I said "Nichts passiert", I said "Alles ist okay"
And he laughed and said "You English, you're far too polite"
And I said "Yes, yes, es tut mir leid"
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5. |
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An audible sigh, I open my eyes
As you get your guitar out again
A new set of phosphor bronze, a me-eared pad
And a borrowed Morrisons pen
Here we go again, what will it be this time?
Please tell me it is not another one about the road.
I'm going to sleep, I'm not being rude, but I've heard it all before
The strangled cat, the same old chords and the awkward metaphors
But wait, what was that? what did I hear you sing?
Please tell me it was not about the Government
Coz you and stuff like that don't seem to fit at all
And if anyone sang along it would be a miracle
stick to tongue-in-cheek, sarcastic or satirical
coz you don't know enough about politics to sing political
You think an opinion poll is a cocky European
I'm surprised you even vote
We only saw Question Time earlier this week
Coz I chewed through your remote
Here we go again, what did I hear you sing?
Please tell me it was not about the budget cuts
Coz you and stuff like that don't seem to fit at all
And if anyone sang along it would be a miracle
stick to tongue-in-cheek, sarcastic or satirical
coz you don't know enough about politics to sing political
Stop writing that protest song
Let's hear about the road
Leave it to Bragg and Prowse and Chris T-T
and others in the know
Coz you and stuff like that don't seem to fit at all
And if anyone sang along it would be a miracle
stick to tongue-in-cheek, sarcastic or satirical
coz you don't know enough about politics to sing political
You'd take gunpowder into parliament but it wouldn't be lit at all
You know the basics like to never vote UKIP at all
You make a beeline for the polling station
Coz you're not hypocritical
But you don't know enough about politics to sing political
You just don't know enough about politics to sing political
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6. |
Half a Song for Suzy
01:29
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Well the night it has borrowed the sun
And the darkness hangs still in the air
But the morning chorus will soon kick in
Honey you'll make it I swear
And there's a dream I've been meaning to dream
You're a bird and you're no longer scared
You've spread your wings and taken flight
Honey you'll make it I swear
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7. |
Ode to Marburg
03:47
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It's so good to be here, I've travelled all day and all night
And I was torn between Bla Bla and Mitfahrgelegenheit
And I fell asleep for a while without even knowing
And I awoke to the sound of a bloke asking where I was going
And I said I'm going to Marburg and I'm gonna be some time
Have a Schluck in the Schlucke and a Bier in the Hinkelstein
Or a Rostige Nagel, or a whiskey, tequila or wine
At Molly's or Sudhaus or Deli or any that rhyme
So wake me up when we get there
We still have a few hours to go
'Til we hit the station
We still have a few hours to go
Yeah I'm going to Marburg and I'm gonna see my friends
Climb up to the Schloß and then swim in the Lahn again
Start out at the Steinweg with the friendliest people I know
And end up at Trauma mit Lecker Eck on the way home
So wake me up when we get there
We still have a few hours to go
'Til we hit the station
We still have a few hours to go
Now I'm here at Molly's, I'm tired and it's getting late
And I'm staring cross-eyed down my SM58
And my T-shirt is soaked, it feels like I've been out in the rain
But I can't tell you how good it feels to be in Marburg again
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8. |
A Simple Song
02:54
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Never gonna buy a jet plane
Or a diamond wedding ring
Chanel, Dior, Versace,
Armani, can't buy these things
I'd love to buy you everything
I think you know it's true
But all I have is a simple song for you
I can't provide a big house
Or someone to keep it clean
Can't 'Ford 'Mustang
Or stretch to a Limousine
I'd love to buy you everything
I think you know it's true
But all I have is a simple song for you
You can forget about the holiday in La Rochelle
Because I checked my balance and nearly fell
I would go to the Casino but I'm not into gamblin'
And the royalties will always pay the bills
Though we ain't ever gonna live like Kate and Wills
I'll keep the wolf from the door with this old mandolin
Maybe when we're old and doddery
I will try and win the lottery
"In it to win it" you gotta be after all
I can't even give you my heart
It's working five to five
Spinning platelets round my body
Keeping me alive
I'd love to give you everything
I think you know it's true
But all I have is a simple song for you
All I have is a simple song for you.
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9. |
Departures
06:18
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The bus pulled into Heathrow and it left me on the street
I went to find departures and I had a bite to eat
Check-in wasn’t open so I had a little time
To get a pen and paper and to watch the world go by
The lady with the zimmer frame was first to catch my eye
Part of me was thinking that she’s far too frail to fly
The steward with her luggage clearly thought the same as me
As he struggled with her trolley he smiled and rolled his eyes at me
And daddy's in his Chelsea shirt it's bursting at the seams
There's sunburn where his hair should be I hope he's packed some cream
And Brandon's playing up again and Courteney's in a hess
And mother's doing all she can to stay inside her dress
And a bunch of lads are waving round a giant England flag
Most of them in matching shirts and one of them in drag
They've had a drink too many and they're getting out of hand
And now they're off to Amsterdam to represent our land
There's a girl who looks like Glastonbury with hair braids and a tan
And tickets from the festy from her elbow to her hand
She spent a year at uni and got lost along the way
And now she's off to India to find herself again
I'm trying to find a coffee coz my throat is getting dry
I'm holding out for a Nero, so I pass the others by
And I find a quiet table in the corner by the tree
And a yuppie (or whatever you call them now) sits down next to me
I'm really glad he did though as we had a lovely chat
He asked about the kids, the house, the dog, the car, the cat
And then he asked me what I really wanted from my life
And only then I realised he was hands-free to his wife
And there's a lady in her forties, she's crouching on all fours
With bottles creams and aerosols all strewn across the floor
She hadn't read the small print and she tried to take too much
And now instead of sailing through she's holding everybody up
And there's a final call for a Mr. Hall who's flying to Dubai
Followed by a red-faced fella swiftly skipping by
He'd been there for an hour or two, we met in Duty Free
He must have settled in the bar or drifted off to sleep
And there's a guy who looks like Rooney but with a couple extra pounds
Writing in his notebook and occasionally looking round
A strawberry blond with stubble and a double chin or three
Reflected in the window, I realise that guy is me
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10. |
More Like This?
03:51
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A friend of mine once told me he was moving to the city
Coz he wants to get a job and get a flat and settle down and marry
But two weeks later he was flat broke living back with his folks
Maybe you should try to write a song about that
Remember that guy Darwin who went out in his canoe one day
But disappeared and never made it back and they all thought he drowned?
Well they found him five years later hanging round in South America
You should try to write a song about that
So I did, What d'you think? Are you happy now? Are you happy now?
You know that thing when you go shopping, forget a basket and end up dropping
All the stuff you're buying on the floor, you pick it up again
You try to leave but minutes later you've bought a dodgy generator
In the car park? You should write a song about that
So I did, What d'you think? Are you happy now? Are you happy now?
Or did you want it to go more like this? More like this? Did you want it to go more like this?
You know that thing that happens when you open up an app you didn't even need
So you sigh and look away, pretend it never happened?
And the licking of your fingertips to stop the chewing gum from sticking
When you throw it away? You could write about that
So I did, What d'you think? Are you happy now? Are you happy now?
So I did, What d'you think? Are you happy now? Are you happy now?
Or did you want it to go more like this? More like this? Did you want it to go more like this?
Did you want it to go more like this? More like this? Did you want it to go more like this?
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11. |
Not Fooling Me
04:27
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You look so peaceful lying down there
With one hand on your shoulder and one in your hair
Your eyelids are flickering, you're pretending to sleep
You're trying not to smile, but you're not fooling me
No you're not fooling me
You think with your hair up they won't notice you
But with that smile and that heart, there's not much you can do
The beauty is there for all to see
Everything's perfect, you're not fooling me
No you're not fooling me
You're not fooling me
No you're not fooling me
So slow down your breathing and close your eyes
I'm going nowhere I'll stay by your side
But I'm dying to watch you so I'll keep on the light
You need the sleep so I'll bid you goodnight
I'll bid you goodnight
I'll bid you goodnight
I'll bid you goodnight
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12. |
The Other Half
03:43
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Well the rain comes to terms with the ground
And the thunder replaces the air
But the sun does its thing above the clouds
Honey you'll make it I swear
And the winter seems so cold and so long
And the trees have all gone bare
But spring is just around the corner
Honey you'll make it I swear
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